Wwaaaagh! Why didn't someone remind me we had a maths test this morning? Honestly, they call themselves my friends, but where are they when I need them?

Seema was all, `I thought you wrote it in your journal.'

Yeah, right! My journal is reserved for far more important things: like recording which excuses I've used for which teachers.
E.g.
Wednesday:
Mr Marlowe, English - the dog ate my homework.
Ms Winterbottom (I mean, get real - what sort of a name is that for a self respecting teacher?) Textiles - my stepmother went into premature labour (again!) and I had to assist so didn't have time to find the fabric samples for my work.
Mr Mukerjee - Science - a huge bird flew down and snatched my homework sheet out of my hand as I was on my way to school. (That's one I was particularly proud of as I thought there was a certain irony to it - the homework had been Biology on genetics!)

And the journal is all cross referenced, so that I can quickly locate the last date, time, and subject I used any particular excuse. (And Mrs Blobby has the cheek to say I'm not an organised person!) The problem is, I've used them all on Mr Yeboa already, so I'm going to have to come up with something original for why I haven't done any revision for today's test.

At break Daniel said, `Instead of wasting time trying to think up an excuse, why don't you spend the time revising?'
Durrr! Who fast-tracked him into adulthood? He can be soooooo unsupportive sometimes.